Thursday, May 22, 2008

I heard a voice from my past

This past Saturday I attended a wedding in Clifton, TX. Someone from El Rancho in Miguel Negrete, Durango was getting married. Well, as we arrived it was already late, I mean late like 10:30pm late. As I stepped out of the car I heard a voice and oh how it sounded familiar. Familiar because it sounded just like my son Michael. I looked over in the dark, several men in groups were talking and drinking beer. One stood out from the smile on his face as I caught a glimpse of his profile from head to toe. He stood there and he was the spitting image of my son.

I went inside to join others and after a few minutes turned around to see who all was there that I might recognize that I haven't seen in years as in 15 years. As I turn I see this man again from his backside and again I saw my son. This man turned and faced my way, just as I husband. I say husband because legally we are still married. 20 years to be exact this year.

I decided to turn back around and not pay attention, however after a few minutes he was brought up to my backside and said hello to the lady sitting next to me, she took care of him as a baby back home in Miguel Negrete. Apparently, he didn't realize that that was me next to her, not until I got up to head to the bathroom. When I turned he was right there and you would have thought he saw a ghost! I could tell he was speechless and shocked all at the same time.

Well the night went on and so did I. I have nothing to say to this man that I once loved. I hold no regrets and grudges but what do you say to someone who once denied his own children, someone who tried to kidnap them at one point, someone who hit me and thought he could get away with it, and the very person who told me one'll never make it without me. I held my head up the whole night and showed him that this person made it.

I have two beautiful sons from this man and he missed the whole show. I only hope that one day should he try to see his son's that neither will turn their back on him and hold a grudge against him. I know I don't. If he were to come up to me, I would say hello how are you, I would carry a conversation as if old friends, however, don't expect me to go up to him and initiate any type of conversation.

I lost a beautiful man after two years of marriage together and determine that I would not let him abuse me, now I hope I don't lose a beautiful son that mirrors him in all the good and none of the bad...........yet.

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